Unseasonably warm isn’t it?  

Hello, lovelies. Christmas. I personally love it. Particularly the ‘we simply must have drinks before Christmas darling!’ spike in my calendar of events. But not everyone enjoys the socialising aspect of the festive season. “All that bloody small talk, I never know what to say, particularly at the office Xmas party where I feel obliged to talk to people I don’t even know!” cried one particularly distressed friend. I said gurl, I have just the thing for you and sent a link to this post, originally published in 2018.  Her response? “Babe you may have just saved my liver for I can now substitute gulping confidence-building alcohol with great conversation!” (love that reader!!) For all of you suffering the same fate – here’s a repost:

Ever found yourself plunged into the realm of small talk and struggling to come up with something more interesting than the weather? Stared at a dating site pondering witty/clever/  sophisticated questions to ask an interested party?  A co-worker in an elevator, an acquaintance at an industry event, a complete stranger at a networking event? It happens to us all. ‘Yes, it is unseasonably warm for this time of year isn’t it?’ Boring.

Let’s kill the small talk!

If you’ve found yourself talking about topics you have no interest in or have already discussed one too many times—just for something to say, check out this great little article by Aja Frost (making small talk so much easier). After reviewing, I started throwing a few out there and along the way, managed to learn fabulous things about people that I’d never have picked up in ‘normal’ conversation. No more awkward silences or boring small talk folks! Here’s a starter kit of unexpected, thought-provoking questions that will evoke more than a mere yes or no response. And there’s something for everyone!

For the culture cravers…

  1. Are you reading any good books right now? How about shows? What would you recommend?
  2. Do you have any podcast suggestions for my commute?
  3. What’s the last movie that made you cry? Or laugh aloud?
  4. Whom would you want to be your Amazing Race partner?
  5. If they made a movie about you, which movie star would you choose to play you? Your family members? Why?

 For the foodies…

  1. If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
  2. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
  3. What’s your go-to comfort food? Or the food your Mum always made for you on your birthday?
  4. Does your family have any “secret” or famous recipes?
  5. What’s your favourite restaurant that other people might not know about

For late-night reveries…

  1. If you were in charge of picking the eighth wonder of the world, what would you choose?
  2. What do you wish you had placed in a time capsule 15 years ago?
  3. What’s the strangest compliment you’ve ever received?
  4. Have you ever thought of a cool invention or company, only to discover someone had already invented or started it?
  5. What would be your ideal superpower?
  6. BONUS Q: If you could invite 5 people, dead or alive, to your dinner party, who would you choose? Why?

For the work buddies…

  1. If you weren’t working here, what would you probably be doing right now?
  2. What’s the craziest thing a boss has ever asked you to do?
  3. Would you rather work four 10-hour days or five eight-hour days?
  4. If you were guaranteed to be successful, what job would you want?
  5. What’s the best career advice you’ve ever received? How about the worst?

 For the travel-hungry…

  1. If you could fly anywhere for free, where would you go?
  2. What’s the coolest road trip you’ve ever been on?
  3. Where’s the last place you traveled? What did you do there?
  4. If you could take a workcation or sabbatical, where would you go and what would you do?
  5. What’s your favourite thing to do around here on the weekends?

For the daters…

  1. What did you think you were going to be when you grew up?
  2. Do you have any hidden talents or surprising hobbies?
  3. What was the must-have accessory or item when you were growing up?
  4. What’s the most unbelievable thing that’s ever happened to you?
  5. What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?

Bet just asking one or two of these questions and you’ll be engaged for hours. Best order another wine (sorry liver)!

What questions do you like to ask to jumpstart a cool discussion?

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3 Comments on Killing small talk…

  1. Jane Davies
    April 10, 2016 at 3:16 pm (8 years ago)

    So handy and I can clearly see how it works so well for you! While it is not an issue for me, there are some wonderful new opening lines that I simply must try. Do not ask 3.) What’s the strangest compliment you’ve ever received?

    A great article and role model! Now, I am off to read the missal of Ms Frost …

    • Jane
      April 10, 2016 at 4:05 pm (8 years ago)

      Haa haa, thanks Miss Jane!!

  2. Jane Davies
    April 10, 2016 at 3:17 pm (8 years ago)

    A must read. So many miss the opportunity to engage. Now you have no excuse.